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How I’m different- Introvert

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Introverts can be good speakers

Hi, thanks for watching this video. This is the third little video on possibly why or how I’m a bit different than some other speaker coaches. And this one is on introversion. I don’t really want to label myself, or anyone else, but typically a lot of the speaker coaches out there, they might be actors, or they might be people who are performers, or just sort of lively people who like to talk. A lot of them are extroverts. And they’ll say, “Well, to be a better speaker, you must be more outgoing like me, or you’ve got to come out of yourself a bit more.” Or being a little quieter is even seen as being a sort of weakness or a sort of self-indulgence.

I can show you how to make interactivity your secret weapon and become a successful speaker

It doesn’t have to be. And I am somebody who loves quiet. I like spending time on my own. Of course, I have friends, and I like to spend time with them too. But please don’t think that because you’re a quiet person or a quieter type that you cannot be a successful speaker. In an earlier video in this little series on why me, I shared about interactivity and how that’s been a bit of a secret weapon for me in helping me get re-booked and helping my audiences really enjoy the work that we do together. And if you are somebody who’s a quieter type, interactivity could be an excellent tool for you as a speaker, if you want to generate lots of energy in the room without having to be like Tony Robbins, jumping up and down, or without having to kind of somehow become an extrovert, if that’s not what you’re looking for.

I won’t try to change who you are: your personality isn’t permanent

And I’m reading a really excellent book right now on psychology, and I should find it, it’s on my phone here, don’t normally do this, but I’ll find it. It’s on Audible and it’s called Personality Isn’t Permanent, and it’s by Benjamin Hardy. So I’ve only just started it, but it’s excellent because he’s talking about not labeling ourselves and the fact that we can be whoever we want to. So I’m not trying to say that we’re all introverts or extroverts, because of course the way that we behave is also situational.

I can show you how everyone can have a big stage presence

So people would look at me when I’m performing, for example, as a singer, and they’ll say, “Oh, you can’t be an introvert. How can you be so outgoing and entertain a couple of hundred people at a time and be an introvert?” So what I’m saying here is you can be whatever personality you want, you be who you want and whatever serves you. But if you’re happy calling yourself an introvert and you feel uncomfortable with coaches that say, “Oh, well, you’ve got to change your personality.” or, “Oh, snap out of it.” That sort of thing. Then that’s not what you’ll get from me because I feel that everybody can be an excellent speaker and it’s about using the right tools and insights for you to give you the results that you need and that you also, that you want.

I will encourage you to ditch labels and be who you want to be

So that’s a little video here about being an introverted speaker, but as I say, no need to label yourself, but maybe there are situations where you’re quieter, there are situations where you are a bit more vibrant and lively, and it’s all good. Take care.

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Shola Kaye is an award-winning speaker, author and professional speaker coach with clients around the world. Her work has been mentioned in Forbes, Harper’s Bazaar and on the BBC.
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*Shola no longer offers 1-2-1 coaching. Please feel free to contact us for coach recommendations.*

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